What Breaks Us Also Shapes Us
There's a Positive Side to Enduring the Inevitable Traumas of Life (Vol. 6; Issue 24)
The existentialist philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche1 famously proclaimed:
What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.
This hardly elicits hope when many of our misfortunes feel like they will kill us. Nonetheless, as we navigate the twist and turns of our life, we inevitably encounter losses, disappointments, betrayals, injuries and other adversities that cause immense pain. However, understanding how these trials ultimately bring growth may offer comfort.
“Determinate negation” ( bestimmte Negation), introduced by the German philosopher G.W.F Hegel2, best describes how setbacks in life can inform us as well as injure us. Trauma quashes our belief systems while opening us up to newer, richer truths. This surprisingly universal phrase applies not only to individual human suffering, but to all kinds of changes.
The way seeds transition into plants illustrates determinate negation. The seed ceases to exist (is negated) when it sprouts into a plant. But the change does not end the significance of the seed. The plant is specifically defined and structured by the seed it left behind.
How might this apply to trauma or injuries in life? Consider what happens if you are betrayed by a lover. Assume you believed your partner to be an honest, loyal companion. Your “natural consciousness,” another Hegelian term, understandably made these assumptions. The belief, perhaps strongly held, is destroyed once the betrayal is discovered.
Following the revelation, the betrayed person passes through a “pathway of doubt” or “the way of despair” (der Weg der Verzweiflung). Here, Hegel notes, people face choices while ensnarled in the intense pain of their reaction. They could fall into a permanent anguish, lose all sense of meaning or become chronically depressed. Over time, though, most people adapt. They integrate the trauma into personalities, and these processes become part of the dynamic, ever-changing nature of life.
Determinate negation applies here because the betrayed person sustained a “negation” of their belief or trust, and emerges forever changed. For a period of time or, perhaps forever, their belief in the lover’s loyalty vanishes. But then a kind of assessment occurs. Betrayals in relationships are sometimes ways of indirectly communicating dissatisfaction with the relationship. Sometimes, it signals its end3.
In any event, the betrayal requires the victim to learn what it means, adjust their perspective and move forward strengthened by the experience. To paraphrase Nietzsche, as long as the betrayal doesn’t kill you, it will leave you forever altered, arguably stronger and certainly wiser. Perhaps the victim of the betrayal will realize they ignored warning signs about that one person, leaving them better equipped when dating others. Or, perhaps they’ll realize they neglected their lover, and therefore share some responsibility in the lover straying. Of course, there are endless other possibilities.
Subsequent thinkers condensed Hegel’s ideas into dynamic concepts of thesis, antithesis and synthesis. These words describe how life’s traumas elicit personal growth, how governments evolve and how ideas change over time. A “determinate negation” occurs at any of these three phases.
Consider a simplified narration of the French Revolution. Fed up with the oppressive monarchy, the French people stormed the Bastille in 1789, overturned the feudal system and ushered in a government devoted to the ideals of Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité. These ideals were quickly negated by the Reign of Terror. The idealistic rebels ended up displaying the same brutal repression as the monarchs, bringing tens of thousands to the guillotine. The country passed through a series of theses, antitheses and syntheses, each beginning with determinate negations.
Each change retained some of what was destroyed. Those wonderful ideas of liberty, equality, and fraternity remained as guiding principles, no matter how much they were sidelined. A set of Republics took form as France evolved over time, culminating in the present one, the Fifth Republic, established in 1958. The iconic French motto Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité lives on as a foundational pillar of French national identity, at least for now.
The idea of successive determinate negations applies to how things have evolved in America. Many believe Trump came to power as a reaction, or an antithesis, to Obama, at least the first time. Biden’s presidency can be viewed as a short-term synthesis followed by the circle coming around again, namely the “thesis” of Trump’s second term. Hopefully, at some later point, we will witness another synthesis, perhaps one that reduces the absurd level of income inequality, reigns in the oligarchs and delivers more equitable solutions to healthcare, housing and immigration.
Determinate negation is hardly an easy concept to understand. It sounds heady and emotionally distant. But within those two words lies much wisdom. Beliefs, concepts, trends and even objects will inevitably be destroyed, but parts of them live on, leading to growth and change. We are much more like sculptures than paintings. As our lives progress, we morph in ways that hurt us but also enliven and empower us. We develop ever deeper, more chiseled characters despite the injuries we inevitably sustain along the way.
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References
Nietzsche, F. (1889/1997). Twilight of the Idols, Or How to Philosophize with a Hammer. Trans. R. Polt. Indianapolis: Hackett Publishing.
Hegel, G.W.F. (1807/1977). Phenomenology of Spirit. Trans. A.V. Miller. Cambridge, UK: Oxford University Press.
Karbelnig, A.M. (2017). The geometry of intimacy: love triangles and couples therapy. Psychoanalytic Psychology, 35(1):70 – 82.